my child
by koty m
Summary: Karen Jennings has just found out she is pregnant and has been having strange nightmares ever since. She goes to John Constantine for help and after some persuasion he agrees to do so, but when he finds out who the father is will he be so willing to help
1. Default Chapter

**Three Months Later**

I didn't understand what was going on. I couldn't be!

"Are you sure? All your tests were accurate?" The small grey haired doctor nodded. A small smile played on her lips.

"Do you know where the father is?"

"No," I looked down to the ground. "It was just a one time thing."

"Well, that's all it takes usually. So tell me how did you met this guy?"

I sighed, "It's stupid, I should of just…..its just….. It should have never happened." I rubbed my eyes, then ran my hands through my hair.

"Let me guess," the doctor came and sat next to me on the examination table " you two met on the street, you needed help and he was cute and there. What could it hurt right?" The doctor gave a shrug, "You end up in conversation, you two have some stuff in common. Next thing you know you invite him up to your place for just a quick cup of coffee, you get to talking more, you get more comfortable with each other, joking and what not. Your thinking the guys not only cute but he's charming and intelligent, you really like him. An instant attraction, you feel like you've never felt before." She put a hand to her heart excitedly emphasizing her point "Then you two end up in bed together and come morning there's no trace of him." The doctor put a hand on her hip when finished.

"close enough." The doctor got off the table and grabbed her charts off the end of the table that held the magazines and puzzles put there for the younger patients. She stood in front of me clutching the charts to her chest with one hand.

"I'm sorry I,mjust familiar with this particular scenario in more ways than one and I'm lashing out. I'm sure it's not doing you any good." She waved a hand absently.

"Don't worry about it." I looked up at the doctor smiling for the first time today. Even though it wasn't a real smile it was still some sign showing that I was willing to deal with this. "You know," I said after a few seconds, "it's not that I'm not happy. I really am, I just….It's not the way I wanted it to happen. I mean we met and hit it off. I thought we might of started something that night but I was just a good lay in the end." I looked down shaking my head, fiddling with the strings on my kaki pants.

"Maybe I'm over reacting. I didn't get his number or anything and he did say he worked for a big company. Maybe I'm just assuming he would do something like that instead of going to him and getting his side of the story."

"Well, Karen all I can say is track him down talk with him and if everything goes ok start over, take it slow." I smiled at that. It felt good to talk, to get it out in the open and sharing it instead of treating it like a dirty secret.

The doctor shifted uncomfortably from one foot to the other. She cleared her throat and shifted again.

"Uh, this isn't the best time to bring this up but," She crossed her arms over her stomach and looked towards the floor, "We have physicians who will….you know……….if you….If you decide not to um, keep the baby." My head jerked up, eyes wide. The doctor gave me a sympathetic look.

"I know, not exactly a pretty subject but we got the best team here and it would be best to get you an appointment as soon as possible before the situation gets even more delicate."

"Oh no, no. I'm keeping the baby. I'm gonna suck it up and take what I get. Besides nothing could make me give up this baby."

"Ok" She gave a pleased nod. "I'm going to give you a list of some prenatal vitamins to take. Now some only start taking them after your 5th trimester ok? The others you should start now." she scribbled on a piece of paper from her charts and handed it to me. I thanked her and folded it up, putting it in my pocket.

"Also I want you to come see me monthly or how ever many times you want. Ask questions and go to classes. Get all the information you need. You'll fell a whole lot better if you do."

"Alright. I'll be sure and do that."

"Until next time then. I hope everything works out for you." I gave a sigh.

"yeah. Thanks again doc, I'll probably be in again next month." and with that I hopped off the examination table, got my purse and keys, and headed out the door.

A guilty pang hit my stomach suddenly, I just ignored it. I couldn't tell her. She wouldn't know what to do. I continued walking down the marble white halls of the hospital. I needed someone who was experienced in my sort of situation. Someone who knew about dreams……nightmares. I had been having them I guess ever since I got pregnant and they hadn't stopped. The same dream almost every night, that was just not normal.

A.N. Ok, I'm trying something new here so if it sucks….sorry. I would appreciate some advice and so on and so forth…..anything that might make the story better, don't hesitate to state it. I hope you all enjoy this. I saw the movie and though it was great but like every movie there is always that one thing that bugs so I decided to fix it ………..sort of. Any who can't give away any more, you might get an idea of what this story is about…that would be great but greater if your left on the edge of your seats…or at least gets you interested.

R&R please!

Koty M

Oh! Yes I know there are mistakes and I will fix them when I get the chance k :D


	2. ch1 who to turn to

Ch. 1 Who To Turn To

I hurried back to my apartment from the pharmacy. I wanted to be in the comfort of my bed.

Everything seemed to happen so fast. No time to just do something for yourself. When you did get time something ended up ruining it, or in my case a mistake was made.

Nice pillows and thick, warm blankets would chase that away for now. I needed to just lay down and sleep. Give my mind as well as my body some time to get organized.

My mind wondered back to what the doctor had said about talking to the father. To what I didn't tell her. Maybe I should have told her. She could have known someone to talk to about the dreams. Hell, she might have even known a few things. Now that I think about it though, those odds were looking pretty slim. I would have to do research myself.

I clutched my stomach a moment as a wave of nausea hit me. I leaned against the stair railing I was walking up. Only one more floor, I told myself. I took a few slow, deep breaths to calm my stomach and once the nausea was gone I continued walking up the stairs to my apartment.

A blast of air conditioning hit my face as I opened the door. I reached to the side of the wall and turned on the lights as I walked in tossing my purse, pharmacy bag, and keys on the kitchen table. The refreshing smell of home, a scent so familiar, made me sigh in relief. It was good to be home.

My couch sat at an angle at the far end of the living area. Fluffy pillows and a spare blanket lay across the back of the couch. I fully intended to take advantage of that.

I walked over to the burgundy corduroy couch and let myself fall into it, situating the pillows under my head and grabbing the blanket. I spread it over me and tucked in the sides as if I were in a straight jacket.

The phone rang loudly from its table stand next to the tv, which was across from the couch.

Sighing angrily, I threw the heavenly warm blanket off of me and hurried to get to the phone before they (whoever that might be) hung up.

"Hello?" My breath was coming a bit speedily from hurrying. It was my mother. I could tell it was her before she even answered. She always lets out a big woosh of air, in excitement when she answers.

"Karen! Are you free for lunch tomorrow or are you working at the shop?"

"No I'm free ma. Why?"

"Karen don't get snoody. I want you to come have lunch with me and an old friend tomorrow. She's just dying to meet you." There was a increase in her tone when she said the last, an almost proud and pleased pitch.

"Alright ma I'll come." I twirled the phone cord around my finger nervously.

"I need to talk to you about something."

"Well what is it? You sounds so serious. Is everything alright?"

"Yeah I just really need to talk to you about this." She made a sound under her breath that said she didn't believe me.

"Really I'm ok it's just I need you to know this before it becomes to late and you get mad at me. You must promise you won't go home tomorrow and tell dad. I want it to be the right timing."

"Karen are you in trouble with the law? Is that what this is about?"

"No ma. Its nothing like that. But listen it's really late and I need to get some sleep. I'll talk to you tomorrow."

"Alright I'll talk to you tomorrow." She was quiet for a second then let out a huff of air.

"You know I hate it when you just drop the subject like this. I absolutely hate it." Her attempt at sounding angry ended up a concerned tone ringing through the other end of the phone.

"I know. I'll talk to you tomorrow."

"Goodnight."

"Goodnight."

After I hung up the phone I mentally kicked myself. There was going to no easy way of telling her that I was pregnant and on top of that I was going to have find someone who could help me with the dreams. Suddenly I remembered reading in the newspaper a man by the name of John Constantine had performed an exorcism on a little girl in downtown L A. It wasn't the greatest choice but hopefully he knew some useful information to tell me. If not then he had to know of someone who could help me. Right?

A.N. ok ok I know it's taken me forever to update but I've been mucho busy with school stuff. I hope you continue to read my fic and thank you all for the excellent reviews.

Koty M


	3. news

News Ch. 2

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What was his name? I stared back at the handsome face so content as he stared back. His brown eyes soft at first glance but something else caught your attention. Mischievousness. He seemed to be luring you to him, seducing you. He seemed to enjoy every minute of it. Why couldn't I think of his name?

I looked at him again more closely. His jaw line, his mouth. The dark blondish hair long enough to frame that perfectly sculpted face. The carefully chiseled muscles of his chest and stomach, left open and uncovered by the thin, white, long-sleeved, button-up shirt. The skin, soft and tanned. Balthazar. I frowned at the sudden spark in my head like a whisper. Like a caress. My eyes widened in realization. That was his name, Balthazar.

He smiled as if he realized, as if he could tell what I was thinking.

"You remember." He made it a purr. His voice surrounding me like velvet wrapping around my body.

He slowly made his way to me. Gracefully, like a cat stalking its prey.

"He won't help you. Not now. Not when you've already decided. It won't matter if the child is human or not. He will kill you both…….

**I awoke with a gasp. Beads of sweat glistened on my forehead and chest.**

"I've got to find this Constantine." I whispered. Not only was I seeing the father of my child in my dreams but now he was telling me someone was going to kill me and my baby whether it was human or not. I furrowed my brows at that. Human or not? What the hell does that mean? I decided I didn't want to know. I was beginning to worry myself. I was taking these dreams to close to heart. But then what if they weren't just dreams?

I shook my head. I was being paranoid…too paranoid. Getting up off the couch I started to walk to the kitchen when nausea hit me like a bat hitting a softball. I covered my mouth half way and walked as fast as I was willing to, to the bathroom without vomiting all over the floor.

I flushed the toilet and got a rag from the towel stand next to the sink. Turning the water on to a suitable temperature I wet the rag and wiped my mouth and set it on the side of the sink after rinsing it out. I hated this part of the pregnancy, throwing up all the time. I hated being sick and throwing up. Now I was throwing up and I wasn't even sick.

I looked at the clock . 10:30. I needed to get ready for lunch with my mother. I went to my bedroom and grabbed a loose fitting, blue, cotton sweater and a pair of blue jeans from my closet and laid them out on the bed.

After a quick shower and getting dressed I let my hair dry naturally since it was curly and blow drying it would make it a mess. I put on my light blue jean jacket and went back to the kitchen. I grabbed my keys and purse and headed for the door but stopped, hand on the doorknob. I turned and looked and the phone book lying on the edge of the table. Well, might as well. I'll never do it if I keep postponing it till the last minute. I got the book and flipped through it until I found the number and address for John Constantine. Tearing it out, I folded it and put it in my pocket before heading out the door.

The restaurant mom wanted to eat at was called Sweat Memories Sandwich Shop. Good for just eating good and light without having to go to a gas station. I pulled on to the curb and mom and her friend was there at the door waiting for me.

"Hello sweetie, this is Margaret Sullow," She turned to Margaret," and this is my daughter, Margaret. Karen." She finished as I got up to them. We (Margaret and I) smiled at each other and mumbled our hi's.

"well shall we go eat." My mother said excitedly and we smiled and went in.

The tables were small but could still fit at least four people. The dark wood and burgundy flowers on the cream walls clashed together nicely. You felt like you were in some little old ladies house about to eat cookies and share old stories from the past.

We ordered our food (sandwiches) and drinks and casually talked girl talk. Margaret talked about her kids and grandkids, showing off pictures as she did. Then she started asking me about what I did for a living, how I liked it here, and so on. She didn't seem to like that I said I owned a little art store and that I would rather live back in Jersey were I grew up, but she didn't say anything. She excused herself to go to the bathroom after a while and I took that opportunity. I sure didn't want to tell my mother I was pregnant when Margaret was there to hear and judge.

"Ma I'd like to talk to you now while we're alone." I gave a deep sigh, "Now don't make a scene. I know I make mistakes, and I have to take responsibility for them so there's no need for you to over react."

"What did you do? What happened?" She gave me a look as if saying "Oh god! I hope this isn't to horrible. I knew something bad was going to happen. She was always the rebellious one. I almost shra back. Unable to tell her but I knew I couldn't keep this a secret for long. I took a deep breath a leaned in close on the table. My forearms resting on the table.

"Mom……I… I'm pregnant." I braced myself for the look of hatred she was about to give me that was like a slap across the face. Who knew, it might even be worse than a slap.

Her face was calm, no expression upon it. Then with a voice matching her expressionless face she said.

"Do you know who the father is? Have you been dating him?" I shook my head, bowing it down so that I looked at the white table cloth. I heard a sigh and couldn't bring myself to look up.

"How did you two meet? Was it just…..," she sighed again. " Do you at least know his name?"

"Balthazar," I whispered.

"Balthazar? What kind of name is that? Does he do drugs? Is he in the mob, karen? Do you know anything about this Balthazar?" Her voice was increasing in volume. I finally looked up at her.

"No, Ma. Nothing like that. Look, he's a good guy. He helped me with some things for my apartment and we got to talking and one thing lead to another. I screwed up I know that."

"When did you find out?" she asked cutting me off.

"Just yesterday."

"Are you going to tell him?"

I sighed, "The doctor said I should so that's what I'm going to do. Besides, I think Balthazar would want to know. He would want to be apart of this babies life."

"So, I suppose that means you've decided to keep it"

I glared at that, "It's not an it, mother. This is a human being. More importantly, My baby and nothing you say will change my mind."

She looked down shaking her head slightly.

"I've gotta go. We'll continue this later, right now I don't have the time or energy to argue with you." I got up from the table, putting my jacket on and grabbing my purse. Margaret was just getting back to the table when I headed for the door. She called out, "Oh it was nice meeting you!" I didn't bother answering back, or waving. I just wanted to find this Constantine guy and get what I needed to know and go home.

A,N sorry it's taken so long for me to update but I hope you stick with the story. Keep reviewing.


	4. john constantine

A.N. Sorry it has taken me so long to update but school is finally out, so expect updates more often. And remember the more reviews, the quicker the updates come Wink.

Oh and for those who remember the movie better than I do, please tell me if I am making any mistakes. I'm pretty sure John Constantine had his name burned or carved into the side door frame of his apartment, if not tell me. I like to be as accurate as possible for the reader's sake. :D

And one last thing, if I don't get John's personality or his smart ass-ness (whatever you want to call it) then tell me. I don't want to make him to much of a softy, he sure wasn't in the movie. Well you know what I mean…..NOW………….

ON WITH THE STORY!

My Child, Ch. 3 John Constantine

His name had been burned into the left side of the door frame to his apartment. The dark discoloration stood out against the natural brown of the rest of the door. Resisting the urge to run my fingers across the rough looking scar, I clinched my fist and took a deep breath before knocking. As I raised my hand to knock the door flung open causing me to gasp.

"Uh…John Constantine?" I stared up at the man who flung the door open. His face was set in hard lines making him seem in a negative mood. He looked as though he had just woke up late for work and needed a cigarette. Pretty rough, but that didn't take away from how handsome it was. Dark eyes and hair seemed to make his skin pale. His choice of black suit clothes didn't help the illusion either.

"Well what do you want?" he asked, voice rough and annoyed.

"well I…um, my name is Karen Jennings and I was… Actually I found your name and address in the phone book and I was wondering if you could help me." He wrinkled his eyebrows.

"I'm not the police lady.."

"Karen. Call me Karen." I interrupted.

"If you need help with an abusive husband or whatever…"

"No. Its not that kind of problem. You see I've been having these strange dreams and I didn't know if they were related to uh…well I'm pregnant and I didn't know if the two were related. I'm also having physical symptoms because of the dreams and I need to know if or how serious this is. If it could get worse, that sort of thing." I bowed my head down, taking a deep breath then slowly looked back up. Annoyed, no bored eyes met mine. "Will you see what you can do?"

"No." he said bluntly and pushed passed me.

I turned and followed him with my eyes. "You're not even going to try? You're not even going to hear me out?"

"No." he didn't even stop while answering.

"Please! Wait! I can pay you!" He stopped and slowly turned to me.

"I don't want your money."

"I don't want to give you my money, but I think this is serious and I need your help. You're the only one I know of who might be able to tell me why I'm having these dreams." He just stood there for a moment before pulling a cigarette out of a pack he got from his jacket pocket. He fiddled with the paper stick, moving it between his fingers, then he put it between his lips and with a lighter from the same pocket, light the cig, cupping his hands around it as he did so. Taking a quick drag, he blew the smoke out in a cloud.

"What would I know about dreams?"

" You tell me. I know of your line of work and that in some instances a….a demon can invade its victims dreams. Right? That's what I've read." He took another drag and blew smoke.

"Sometimes."

"Should I tell you my dreams or what?" I lifted my arm to him, showing him my forearm. A red symbolic mark about an Inch wide and an inch long was there just below the flat of my palm. "Do I need to show you this? How do you want to do this?"

"you're serious about this, aren't you." It wasn't a question. He looked me in the eyes for the first time.

"Yes. I've been having these strange dreams ever since I got pregnant." John Constantine sighed and took a drag of the cig. He blew the smoke out and said, "Lets go back inside. I have a felling I'm going to need to sit for this one."

"Do you know what that symbol means?" he asked once we got into his apartment.

"It's a mark of ownership or like a brand of some sort. That's all I know about it. The rest of the pages on the symbol and its meaning had been torn out."

"Torn out?"

"Yes. The store owner of the book store I went to said that a man had came in and just simply walked over to one of the shelves and took the book, started rummaging through it and started tearing out the pages…well half of the page anyway."

"Really…and what happened next? Did he tell you?"

"He said the man just left and took the pages with him. The storeowner went after him but when he got out the door the man was nowhere to be seen."

John sighed. He took another drag of his cigarette but this time he started coughing when he blew the smoke out.

"You know those things will kill you." I said looking at him soberly. He glared at me before sitting down and putting out the cig.

"The symbol is a brand used by demons in Hell's bible, where they would take mortal women and use them as breeders to create more warriors for their cause or sometimes a half breed makes it on to earth, he finds a women and unites with her. She becomes pregnant. They don't always know that the women became pregnant but when they do, they track her down and take what is theirs." I visibly shuddered. This was getting way to bizarre.

"Well I sure as hell wasn't taken as a breeder…is it possible…never mind. I just can't see the man who fathered this baby being a half demon." I shook my head. "I usually would never believe this sort of thing. As a matter of fact I would probably leave right now if I wasn't positive something strange was happening."

"Well what's stopping you? For all you know I could be lying to you." I looked at him. Face hard.

"Are you?" he tilted his head slightly looking at me.

"I wish I was." I looked back down folding my hands in my lap.

"Are there half breed angels…is that what you would call them?"

"Yes, but they're all called half breeds. Their purpose is serving the fuller bloodline. They, by that I mean both breeds, spend most of their time trying to weasel their way up with the big boys or over ruling them."

"They always have a sob story telling why they need to create a new heaven or hell."

"So…"

"You know, you never told me who the sorry bastard is…the father."

"Well he said his name was Christian, but his friends called him Balthazar. I almost laughed at the irony. A guy named Christian getting a nickname like…"

"What did you say!"

A.N. Alright! Tell me what you guys think. And I'll need a bit more help with Christian mythology as you can probably tell. Oh I hope you Like that whole Christian/Balthazar twist hehehe.


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